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5.24.2009

I HATE YOU


my name is ayub

my fight is not on the saddle of a black horse

my fight is not behind an armor and a shield

i declare a war upon myself

from the minute i utter
"No God but Allah The One"

i am prepared for all the struggle

everyday is a struggle to prioritize others before me

everyday is a struggle to preserve the honor of this deen

everyday is a struggle to object the urge to ruin the whole world

everyday is a struggle to preserve muslimah as a Glimmering Ruby

everyday is a struggle to educate myself self awareness

everyday is an advice to myself before others

everyday is a struggle to strive in being a truthful slave of Ar-Raheem

i'll work hard to die in this deen

and to wake up every morning like Umar R.A

when he said;

every morning i want to see my brothers and be with them
i cant wait to see them and give my love upon them
i want to be around them and fight with them

if im going to lose all my property for this deen and so it be

if im going to lose my sleep at nights for this deen and so it be

if im going to lose a second of my life for this deen and so it be

if im going against the world for this deen so it be...


NOTHING ELSE except this deen

SO DONT MESS WITH ME SHAITAN

u failed me today

BUT SCREW YOU ...

I'll die begging for His mercy and not to be with you

I HATE YOU

I SINCERELY HATE YOU

because of you we fight with each other

because of you we die in overtakin each another

because of you most of us forget who fed

who loved us

who cared for us








but Allahu Rabbi forgive me when i do wrong

Ighfirli Ya Rabb

how could i transgress upon You while u gave me this life

without wanting anything back except having more mercy showered upon me

no love is like Yours...

sorry for my mistake today...

i'll regret it all my life



to SHAITAN and MYSELF

you will not break me!

YOU WILL NOT BREAK MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

!@#Q#$@#$%@#$%




2 comment:

Balqies Arafia says:
at: May 24, 2009 at 10:26 PM said...

I don't have the slightest clue on what you did but Ayub do remember that Islam is about being tolerant.

and Allah swt is a forgiver, no matter how big/small ur sin is as long as you bertaubat and redha Allah swt will always forgive you.

there is no point punishing yourself to the extreme, what you can do is seek for forgiveness and insya'allah you'll be forgiven.

aj says:
at: May 24, 2009 at 10:57 PM said...

indeed balqies...

thnx for the advice!